Moved to a new city? How to meet people and start dating

Every year, huge numbers of people move to Bengaluru, Pune, Hyderabad, Mumbai, Delhi and Chennai for work or study. The first few months can be lonely. Your colleagues have their own lives, your old friends are a phone call away rather than a short ride, and you do not yet know which café is good or which road floods in the monsoon. Dating can feel impossible when you do not even know where to suggest meeting.

This guide is about getting settled and opening up your social life, including dating, at a pace that feels comfortable.

Learn the city first

Before you start meeting people, spend a few weekends getting to know your area. Walk around, find a café you like, work out how the metro or buses connect to the rest of the city. Knowing a handful of places well gives you confidence. When a date asks where you would like to meet, you will have an answer.

Our city guides are written for exactly this. Each one describes neighbourhoods, date spots, how to get around and local safety notes. If you have just moved, start with your own city, for example the Pune guide, the Hyderabad guide or the Chennai guide, and then read the page for your neighbourhood.

Build a social life alongside dating

Relying on dating alone to meet people puts a lot of pressure on each date. It helps to build other connections at the same time:

• Join a class or a club: a running group, a language class, a theatre workshop, a trekking group.
• Say yes to colleagues' invitations, even when you are tired.
• Look for community events in your city. Myra lists events for cities where they are running.
• Choose friendship first as your intent if you want to meet people without the pressure of dating. Myra will only introduce you to others who chose the same.

Use your languages

Moving often means living somewhere whose main language is not your own. Meeting people who share your home language can make a new city feel less foreign. List every language you speak on your Myra profile; shared languages are one of the strongest reasons for an introduction. Our guide to dating across languages in India has more.

At the same time, learning a little of the local language opens many doors. People appreciate the effort, even if you only manage a few phrases.

Set a realistic distance

In a new city, it is hard to judge how far is too far. Ask colleagues how long their commutes take, and look at how the metro lines run. Set a distance on Myra that you would be happy to travel on a weekday evening. You can change it later as you learn the city.

Choose first-date places you know

Suggest places you have already been to, so you know they are busy, comfortable and easy to leave. Cafés near a metro station, a mall food court, a popular park or a promenade in the early evening all work well. Avoid places you have never seen, and do not let a date choose somewhere unfamiliar and out of the way for a first meeting.

Stay safe while you are still learning

When you are new somewhere, you have less local knowledge and fewer people to call. A few habits matter even more:

• Arrange your own travel there and back, and check the last train or metro before you go out.
• Use Share my date to send the time, the place and your match's first name to a friend, even one in another city.
• Keep your new address private until you know someone well. Myra shows other members only your area and city, never your exact location.
• Save 112, India's national emergency number, and know where the nearest police station is.

Our first-date safety guide covers this in more detail.

Give it time

It takes most people several months to feel at home in a new city, and longer to build a real circle of friends. Dating may feel slow at first. That is normal. Each coffee, class and conversation adds to your sense of belonging, and a relationship often grows more easily once the rest of your life feels settled.

When you are ready, see how Myra works, and start with the guide to your new city.